7.19.2015,6:40 PM
My place in this world

Calmness is being outside
When the sun rises
With kingbirds squeaking
Killdeers calling
And Coyote songs
Echoing around.
The emptiness of humanity
Is filled with the richness
Of others
And fills me with calm
And wholeness.
This is my place.
With them.
As a nothingness
That is complete.

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posted by Macrobe
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6.14.2015,9:38 PM
When we get older.......
Met a couple today on the Refuge, in their early 70's, riding around the west two-up on a Kawasaki KL250 (the little brother of the KLR650) for the past three months. Living off the back of the bike, camping under junipers, in fields, in sagebrush. She used to ride an old BMW125 when she was raising her children and hundreds of cattle. He's been riding bikes since he was 12 yo. They got married four months ago.

They are my heroes. They are living life as it is meant to be lived. Alive and free.
posted by Macrobe
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6.01.2015,9:36 AM
The Rule of Seven. Happy New Year, Self!
I hate the number seven. It seems that every seven years, my humanity is tested. Sometimes the trial is tough, challenging, and sometimes I fail. Trip and fall. Hit my head and have a headache for a year. But I always get up, put myself back together and carry on. The Survivor mentality. 

Or, as my father used to say, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

By knowing things that exist, you can know that which does not exist. That is the void.” - Miyamoto Musashi

Last time was another test of my humanity. It wasn't as devastating as it was back in 2006. But, then again, I'm not as young as I was, either. And betrayals never get any easier to bear. Again, this was partly my own fault for forgiving an earlier transgression that I should have not have. 'Another chance,' I convinced myself. And it bit me a few years later.

"I feel like 

I've been here before, 
and you know, 
it makes me wonder, 
what's goin' on, 
under the ground."
Déjà vu.

Lesson hammered home. The Void.

Yet..... if this past trial had not happened, I would not be where I am now. I am strong, happy, productive, and full of life. Living what exists now, I also know what no longer exists. And I am grateful for that. Rising from the ashes and flying with flames of rebirth. "In my pockets, I carry new-found fruits and seeds that nourish my journeys. And scatter some along my way."

Happy First Anniversary, Phoenix. Welcome back, you old wolf. 
Let's go, brother Coyote. We have an adventurous road of discovery ahead of us.

The truth is that strength lies in the interior of the Warrior: in his heart, his mind and his spirit… The heart is essential in helping the intellect to understand the spirit.” - Miyamoto Musashi, Book of Five Rings

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posted by Macrobe
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4.08.2015,10:30 PM
When is a Brontosaurus not a brontosaurus? Never!
Dear Mr and Mrs. Brontosaurus,

You were always my favorite dinosaur. You were with me when I was little. I kept your little rubber figures next to my bed.

When I was a teenager, I ducked underneath the 'Stay Out!' ribbon and crawled underneath a life-sized replica of you. I sat and gazed up through your skeleton until they threw me out of the museum.

I protested when they took your name away, and whispered to you that I would always call you 'brontosaurus'.

When I was in my early 40's You came home with me from a big famous museum and sat on my dresser. You were almost as big as my upper dresser drawer.

When I had my lab in north Texas, a smaller version of you hung over our PCR machine to bring luck to our experiments.

Now they have given you your name back. But, rest assured, my friends, you have always been 'brontosaurus' in my mind and in my dreams.

Welcome Home, my noble beast.

'Brontosaurus' name resurrected by new dino family tree

 "The fossils originally called Brontosaurus show enough skeletal differences from other specimens of Apatosaurus that they rightfully belong to a different genus. The study, published online this week in the journal PeerJ, brings the long-banished name back into scientific respectability as a genus coequal with Apatosaurus."

Science| DOI: 10.1126/science.aab2447

(And Pluto is still 'Pluto', the planet!! :)

Bronty. The good luck PCR dinosaur. She later retired to DNA sequence analysis.
posted by Macrobe
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2.16.2015,12:41 PM
A place amongst the invisible
"Escaping notice need not be about complacent isolation, mindless conformity or humiliating anonymity. When circumstance confers invisibility upon us, perhaps it is something to appreciate and even welcome, as some iteration of the small imprint, low-impact living it makes sense to aspire to. Or possibly as a more profound poise, a fuller appreciation for our place in the greater scheme of things."

How to Be Invisible, by Akiko Busch, a New York Times essay.

I love this essay. Surrounded by the current crazy need for 'notice me now!' in our current world, I still treasure the solitary moments of invisibility. For those of us that seek it to find a balance in our modern lack of privacy, read this essay.

Growing up, I sought invisibility. Not because of insecurities, but to immerse myself in the natural world around me. The demands of people competed with lessons I wished to learn. It taught me much about not only myself, but about all other life. And influenced my life, from career to relationships with people and animals.

"...it can be a condition of insight and endurance, a position of strength and power, a matter of knowing how and where we can be best accommodated by the exterior world. It can reflect a knowledge that we are of a larger world and that our survival depends on knowing this — not a bad thing to be reminded of when our disruptions of the natural environment result in everything from freakishly warm temperatures to ocean acidification."
posted by Macrobe
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1.12.2015,7:56 PM
Fort Craig, New Mexico
Last weekend was cultural history time for me.

Visited Fort Craig for a day. A more thorough post will be uploaded later in the week. For now....

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posted by Macrobe
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1.11.2015,10:43 AM
What's love got to do with it.........
Perhaps after five decades, 'love' and all the related entanglements become something one can pick up and wear for a day, like a piece of clothing, or it becomes an old friend and companion, always at your side but without all the frivolous ornaments that adorn younger phases. And then for some of us it's a dog-eared well-worn book read only by ourselves, constantly rewritten.

Regardless, truth is always in the eyes. Which is why so many people are very uncomfortable with eye-to-eye contact. It doesn't have to be 'love'. Too many 'lovers' and 'friends' avert prolonged eye contact. Some of them don't want to know the truth, or they try to hide it. The eyes have a language all their own.

The eyes say it all.
posted by Macrobe
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