10.23.2006,5:32 AM
Bikes and Sinus Demons
Sinusitis: that's when you hate your sinuses and your sinuses hate you.

It's hard to believe that such small cavities in your head could cause you such misery. But they can; packed full of polyglycosaminoglycans, commonly called 'snot', killing all sense of taste and smell, overfill running out your nose, your eyes bulge out to escape the pressure, and your head pounds in protest, "Get this crap out of my head!!" with a constant banging on the frontal cranium above your eyeball orbs.

I dread putting on the helmet in fear of a sneezing fit (keep the faceshield up); the bottom front bangs your sternum with each forward explosion of air and snot. The already inhibited abilitiy to breathe sends claustophobic signals of suffication to your lizard brain. And you are always questioning "Did I stuff enough tissue in my tank bag?".

Oddly enough, once the bike is rolling the pressure inside the sinus cavities subsides, as if they've been appeased like little screaming children being soothed by a lullaby. One nostril at a time, the little sinus demons withdraw; you can feel their creeping exit down the caverns in your head, sometimes with an audible "Pop!", but to where?

Debark from the bike, remove helmet and they return in full force with 60 seconds of violent sneezing ensuing. It makes me want to get back on the bike and keep going, never stop as if the nasty little sinus demons are chasing me and I must escape.

I bike for ice cream and ride to escape the Sinus Demons in my head.

Now I think I have really lost it.........
posted by Macrobe
Permalink ¤